31 August 2005

::The Oxford Dictionary's latest definition of the following words


Atom Bomb : An invention to end all inventions.

Boss : Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.

Cigarette : A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fireat one end and a fool on the other.

Classic : A book which people praise, but do not read.

Committee : Individuals who can do nothing individuallyand sit to decide that nothing can be done together.

Compromise : The art of dividing a cake in such a waythat everybody believes he got the biggest piece.

Conference Room : A place where everybody talks, nobodylistens and everybody disagrees later on.

Criminal : A guy no different from the rest....except that he got caught.

Dictionary : A place where success comes before work.

Diplomat : A person who tells you to go to hell in sucha way that you actually look forward to the trip.
Doctor : A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills.

Etc. : A sign to make others believe that you know morethan you actually do.

Experience : The name men give to their mistakes.

Father : A banker provided by nature.

Lecture : An art of transferring information from thenotes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passingthrough the minds of either.

Miser : A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.

Office : A place where you can relax after yourstrenuous home life.

Opportunist : A person who starts taking bath if he accidentallyfalls into a river.

Optimist : A person who while falling from Eiffel towersays in midway "See I am not injured yet."
Philosopher : A fool who torments himself during life,to be spoken of when dead.

Politician : One who shakes your hand before electionsand your confidence after.

Smile : A curve that can set a lot of things straight.

Tears : The hydraulic force by which masculinewill-power is defeated by feminine water power.
Yawn : The only time some married men ever get to opentheir mouth.

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